( OPEN ) Peter Q

[aromantically]

overflow, prompts, general ic contact; drop it here.

Comments

for @dothis

[aromantically]

[ continued from here. ]

No cause this one's gonna work. Get in here and help me!

[dothis]

Convince me that it's not gonna fail like 99.9% of your other plans did. Seriously. I'm listening.

[aromantically]

Uh we strap the forties to the puppies then they bring them to us and we drink them. It's brilliant. And simple. And really smart and better than any idea I've ever had before now.

[dothis]

Yeah? Where exactly are you gonna get the pups, then? Do we have a surplus of them aboard the ship that I didn't know about?

[aromantically]

At the puPPY STORE. Why are you being so negative right now?!

[dothis]

BECAUSE I WANTMY ALCOHOL QUILL AND THIS STUPID PLAN OF YOURS WONT BE GETTING ME ANY!

[aromantically]

has anyone ever suggested that you might be an alcoholic? Maybe that's why youre so mean

[aromantically]

It's late at night and he's the only one awake on the Milano. Thor snores even louder than Drax, but he's used to tuning that out, at least. Nothing could really take him away from the singular focus of staring at Gamora's face on the display anyway. It's depressing, but it also keeps him motivated and focused. Coming back from the dead was one thing, but coming back only to realize the woman he loved most was gone forever... and then the fullness of his heart when he saw her again, he thought it might burst right out of his chest. He's getting that same feeling, a hand over his chest as he leans towards the map when suddenly - it pings, picking up a signal from nearby. His heart starts pounding against his ribcage under his palm and he feels like he might swallow it if he's not careful.

"Where are you, Gam?" It's murmured as he subtly changes course in the night so he can tuck the ship out of sight. There's something poetic about coming here, even as a burnt out husk of a planet. This is where it all began, even if Gamora doesn't remember. He needs to believe he can get through to her - he will. She's the same person he met back then. He's just... grown. Maybe it will even be easier this time, if he can temper his patience. He makes sure the ship is hidden even though their main threat is dead, turned to ash the way he should have been since the first time he took Gamora away. He does the dad walk around, making sure everyone is really sleeping. He finds Groot's light on, but him passed out and he smiles, tucking him in like he's a sapling again before heading out into the cold night.

He keeps his helmet on, not sure about the state of the atmosphere and it's much chiller than it used to be here, too. It makes his chest ache for a whole different reason, remembering what this place used to be as he walks through the rubble of the city square. Peter hears the click of heels and whirls around, his breath catching in his throat the way it did the first moment he laid eyes on her.

"Please don't hit me again," is what she gets in lieu of a greeting, and caution be damned he hits the button so she can see his face. "I'll keep my hands to myself this time. Not even a little pelvic sorcery." He holds his hands out to show his dedication to this route, preparing himself for the moment she runs and he has to start the chase all over again. He will keep searching, forever, for as long as it takes. That doesn't mean it wouldn't be nice if she listened to him the first time. He can't help but be hopeful of just that.

[amongfriends]

She wants to make things right. Gamora has spent her life a prisoner. If she's going to truly be free from Thanos, dead or not, she needs to take steps to ensure she won't land in another cell. The best way she can think to do it is to go plead her case on Xandar. If any law agency in the galaxy is likely to hear her out, maybe even believe her, it'd be the Nova Corps.

Maybe she should have asked about their fate before running off. She finds herself in ruins as it slowly occurs to her that it is very likely her crimes do not need to be explained or forgiven if the people they were against are too dead to listen. It's a sobering thought that distracts her or so she tells herself at least.

Peter is quiet enough when he wants to be. She doesn't know that yet. She's spotted him first so it hardly matters. Rather than run again, she audibly walks toward him. Her hands rest on her hips when he catches on and addresses her. She winces a little when he takes off helmet. She isn't sure a Terran can bear this environment. She isn't going to admit that either.

"What do you want?" Gamora puts on a good show of being irritated despite her curiosity. She isn't the woman he loved. What possible reason does he have for tracking her down? Speaking of.... Her eyes narrow. "Are you following me?"

[aromantically]

"Following you?" He scrunches up his face like it's a ridiculous accusation, taking a half step towards her out of habit more than anything. He won't remember moving later. "No. Well..."

It sounds unconvincing to even his ears, and he laughs only to immediately regret it, closing his helmet for a few moments at least so he can catch his breath again.

"They're rebuilding." he says, effectively changing the subject. She doesn't know him well enough yet to know he'll circle back. "It'll be more amazing than it was before. Do you remember?"

Peter hits the button again, his eyes wide and wet when they're revealed. She can never remember what happened, and it hurts, but just seeing her again overrides all that. He really needs to not cry right now, as impossible a task as it seems now to hold it together in front of the one person he trusts to see him fall apart.

"This is where we first met. Do you wanna hear about it?"

[amongfriends]

She's wary of him. It's not fair in the slightest. This is a man who has taken in her sister evidently more than once. As far as she can tell, no one on his ship is being mistreated. She's still skittish from many years of imprisonment. Her hand goes to one of her daggers as she waits to see if he'll get any closer. She's still waiting for a threat that isn't coming.

It's his eyes that disarm her. Without realizing it, Gamora's hand drops to her side. She's only known love as a weapon to be wielded against her for so long. When he looks at her like that she doesn't think he means to hurt or manipulate her. He reminds her of an open wound. She can't find it in her heart to be cruel to him even if it'd make things simpler. "You know that I don't." Gamora reminds him. She's resigned to knowing she lived a life once that her fath- captor stole from her. This man is a part of that lost life. It makes her want to meet him halfway if only for now.

"You can tell me about somewhere else. What I'm looking for isn't here."

[aromantically]

His face flushes subtly when he realizes he asked the wrong question. It's only when he sees her drop her hand that he registers the step he took earlier too and he makes an effort to stay still from that moment on, slowly lowering his hands so she can see he's not reaching for anything.

"I meant... this place. It was really beautiful." Peter smiles softly and shrugs a shoulder, something playful entering his expression at the last minute. He gives a show of thinking about a different story to tell her and ends up with just the right one, he thinks. It's like a visible lightbulb appearing above his head. "You... uh. Sorry, is it better if I call other-you "she" or "you?""

He wrinkles his nose before pressing on.

"Whatever. I told you this story about when I was a kid, you said you loved it. I would carry a picture of Hugh Hefner in my pocket to school - he's a famous actor and movie star on Earth - and tell the other kids he was my dad. They made fun of me for him never being around, so I made up that story so they'd leave me alone. You were there when I met him, not Hugh Hefner, my real dad. A real creep named Ego, he was a god, little-g. We went to his planet together even though I wasn't sure, you told me I had to know the truth. And if he turned out to be total garbage me and you would just kill him."

Those tears come back, a prickle in each eye she'll be able to see though he still refuses to let them fall.

"It was an amazing place even though you can probably guess what happened next. And I was just happy I got to see it with you."

[amongfriends]

She watches his hands carefully for a moment. Gamora can see what he's doing and it's nice? She thinks. Or insulting; like she's being pacified. Maybe that take is just another way of keeping her distance from him. Gamora can't be sure since this man seems to make everything complicated. She wishes that would stop.

She does listen. He is right. She likes this story. It's sweeter than any Thanos ever told even the end hurts a little. She can guess a little-g god would be an unkind creature even if his tears didn't betray him.

This time she doesn't hold back the cold truth despite seeing them. "You should call her by the other name. She isn't me. I never saw those things." She can't keep the hurt out of her voice. Can you miss something you never had? Gamora wonders.

[aredreams]

It starts out a chance meeting as kids. She's beat to Hell in another fight with a rival gang. While the other members of her crew have moved on, Gamora is left to fend for herself. It's no surprise to her. The Black Order is all about survival of the fittest. She couldn't keep up so it's only right she got left behind. She's limping her way back to her adoptive father's place when a lady pulls over to help. Not even Gamora's meanest look or iciest threat will get Meredith Quill to leave a kid alone in that state.

She gets in the car and lets the lady take her back to her place. It's daring fate. The last time she let herself be taken by an adult she ended up in a cycle of violence she can't break out of. Today is different. Meredith takes care of her injuries, feed her a good meal, and introduces Gamora to her son. It turns into one of the best days of her life. For the first time since her parents died, she gets to be a kid. She listens to music and watches movies with mother and son. No one asks questions she can't answer. It's just nice in a way she missed desperately.

She leaves when it's well into the night with only the promise that she'll come back to let them know she's okay. (She does about two weeks later with some fresh bruises mixed in with the healing ones.) It turns into a habit. Sometimes weeks or months would pass, but she'd wander in for a day. It's wonderful every time.

It can't last, of course. Meredith gets sick. Peter's grandfather makes it more than clear he isn't going to let some strange girl keep showing up to cause his daughter trouble. She backs off save for the anonymous gifts. Money means nothing to Gamora. Why not steal from the people her father sets her against if it means funding Meredith's treatments? It doesn't save her though. Her father comes down hard on her once finds out what she's up to. He makes it clear Meredith wouldn't be the only Quill dead if she didn't keep her distance. She leaves Peter to his grief. It's better to be sad than dead.

Years pass before they see each other again. They're both trying to steal the same thing to get away from their respective guardians. Gamora doesn't have it in her to kill him to get it. (The interference from other interested parties definitely didn't help.) She lets him escape and returns empty-handed. She makes it clear to her siblings she's done. She wants out. They decide to grant her request provided she can get past all of them out the door.

Once she succeeds, Gamora knows where she needs to go. It takes some work, but she tracks down Quill. Just like when they were kids, she stands outside the door waiting to be let in. "I left." She shouts through the door. If he looks outside, he can see what it costs. There's not a part of that isn't covered in blood. Some of hers, some of it her siblings. Her reputation is honestly the only thing keeping her from getting picked up by the cops. Who would dare go against the deadly Gamora? She's as free as can be from the consequences of her actions.

Deep down she knows it can't last forever. Her siblings didn't have their father's approval to let her go. He'll be back for her. For now, she won her right to be free. She'll spend it here if Peter will allow it. "I don't want to be your enemy. I want to be someone Meredith would be proud of." She almost chokes on the name. Gamora pushes through it to finish what she has to say. "You don't have to let me in. I just wanted you to know why I did it." She backs up, turning to leave. Meredith is dead. She's done nothing to prove to Peter she's worth the trouble. At least for today she'll prove to herself Meredith wasn't totally wasting her time on some brat with a death wish.

[aromantically]

Peter doesn't understand why the one moment he needed her most, Gamora left. He didn't understand until his mother got sick that their worlds were diametrically opposed. He tells himself he hates her for leaving and tries to move on, but the worst day of his life somehow gets even worse when a strange man abducts him. His crew call themselves The Ravagers and they raise Peter to be just like them. There's no opportunity for him to go back until it's too late, and once his grandfather is dead what difference does it make? It was probably more peaceful for him without Peter around anyway, or at least, he tries to convince himself of that as well.

The shock of seeing Gamora that day sticks with him, but he fights her with every ounce of vitriol he feels towards her betrayal, or what he perceives as such. The thing is: he knows he's not as good as her so when he "wins" it's an empty victory. He's left wanting to know why, but there's no explanation to be had. All Peter can do is use his treasure to buy his freedom and he manages, for a while.

He's staying in a motel by the ocean, but even this peaceful seaside village can't calm him down. The paranoia sets in all too quickly, knowing Yondu will be tracking him down. Some time passes and no one bothers him, he starts to get comfortable. That is, until one day he hears the stomp of boots outside. All his blinds are drawn and there are multiple latches on the door, he grabs his gun and goes as quietly towards the front of the room as he can, careful to stay away from the windows as he leans a shoulder into the wall, ready to spring into action. But hearing her voice... it's the last thing he expects.

Remaining silent, he listens to her explanation, tears rising unbidden to his eyes at the mere mention of his mother's name. No one's said that name to him since the day she died. When he starts to hear her steps retreat, he unlatches the door and pulls it open a crack and then he waits. The gun is lax by his thigh, his finger outside of the trigger guard, but he lies to himself again that he'd fire if he had to.

[aredreams]

A cracked door only reminds her of what she's lost. Meredith would have swung the door all the way open. Peter would have run to her. Those are the old days. None of them can go back. She wipes her face with her jacket sleeve and heads towards it. Tactically it's a stupid move. That's how you get a bullet in your head. Gamora knows better than this. She also doesn't care. She rather die here than lose hope the boy who made her smile is lost forever.

She pushes open the door gently as she can and steps inside the room. Gamora only spares Peter a fleeting glance, eying his gun before shutting the door just as gently behind her. She'll give him all the power in the situation regardless of how stupid it is. He might actually have a shot of taking her in this state. It's a risk she's willing to take. Her heart aches with how wrong he looks with that gun, but she pushes past that. He let her in. That means something.

"Can I use your bathroom?" It almost sounds like a joke. How many times has she asked that question after coming over with a split lip or some other unexplained injury?

[aromantically]

His heart catches in his throat when she walks in, not truly believing it's her until he sees her up close. Slowly, he nods, turning to watch her, not that she seems capable of much in this state. Why would she come here? It isn't until she's moved further into the room that he realizes they're in the same exact situation. How unbelievably fucked up. He latches the door behind her and clicks the safety on, stashing the weapon in the back of his waistband as he trails after her, like when they were kids; he would follow her all around the house until she got sick of it.

"I left, too." He says it with a hoarse voice, he probably hasn't spoken to anyone in days at least. The forgiveness comes in a wave, sudden and cold. If she really came here to take refuge, Peter knows he won't be able to say 'no' even if it turns out to be some elaborate hoax crafted by her father.

[aredreams]

She nods slowly. Gamora navigates the space without much effort. She's been in enough motels doing business for her father to know where things should be. Him trailing her is a comfort even now that they're too old for this to be normal.

Once they are inside, she wastes no time shrugging off her jacket. She gets to work scrubbing herself off. She's as numb as ever to the pain. It's the only way she can properly assess the damage. "I thought so." Which as close as she can get to admitting that's what aided in her decision to let him win.

[aromantically]

He hangs in the doorway, watching her and wanting nothing else but to step in. It's habit to catalog all of her injuries and imagine how she got them. Her words confirm what he already knew and all he can do is sigh - it doesn't feel any better to win now than it did then.

"Here, just... just stop that. Okay?" Peter steps forward to take her hands, stilling them and attempting to steer her to sit on the closed toilet lid. He turns to set the gun on the lip of the tub and goes for a clean towel to dab at her wounds with. He crouches down in front of her and goes through each wound meticulously.

[amongfriends]

It starts off so subtly that Gamora doesn't even register it. She doesn't feel like family to them the way she does Nebula, but the job they took went off with only a few hitches. That was near perfect in their book. She's shopping with her share when she picks up a food item she's never seen before. The vendor warns her that only a small number of species can consume it, but Gamora has to have it. It isn't until later when Groot is swearing to stay off video games for the rest of the day in exchange for it that Gamora realizes who it could be for. She chalks it up to an excellent guess on her part. The video games always make him moody. While he's never disrespectful to her, the way he talks to Peter does bother Gamora though she is loathe to admit it.

She starts to feel disturbed when Groot's language starts becoming rapidly understandable. She's no fool, but she finds herself carrying conversations with him much too quickly for comfort. They hurt terribly each time. She is starting to recognize from his tone alone how much he misses his mother. It makes her feel like a thief every time he gets excited over even the tiniest bit of praise or concern. She's taking a dead woman's love. It happens so naturally that the guilt only sets in after they've parted ways.

There are smaller instances with the others. She finishes a story Drax told endlessly during their initial travels, but never to this Gamora. She touches Rocket's shoulder when he's going on a tangent to a stranger. He looks at her like she's a ghost come to haunt him. Another day she pushes forward some spices to make noodles the way Mantis likes them as a reward. She cannot for the life of her even remember seeing Mantis eat noodles, but surely she must have at some point.

It's with Peter that things start to get scary. She starts by tapping her feet subtly before her other self's favorite songs come on. It's so small that she can rationalize it. They are growing on her, that's all. There's no explaining singing "Jolene" while cleaning the ship together. Peter never sang this to her and more importantly, Gamora didn't even realize she had been singing until he stared at her with those bright eyes of his. The words play back in her mind. The voice, while hers, is totally alien. It comes from someone lighter; happier. Content to do something as simple as clean the ship rather than accepting responsibility because the others made themselves scarce.

Her throat closes up. Gamora cannot get back to her quarters fast enough. She shuts the door behind her and struggles to force air down into her lungs. Gamora will rationalize this away too in order to protect herself. Her mind hasn't gotten that far ahead yet.

[aromantically]

The lyrics to the song he sang to her, so long ago now or so it feels, cut through him like razor wire. He turns a wide, doughy gaze on her, opening his mouth, but before he can even start the question she's taking off. He sighs, shoulders slumping as he looks around at their handiwork. Good enough to call it a day, he decides, slowly trailing after her. She's already slammed the door, causing a tiny grimace, but he doesn't let it deter him, leaning against the wall next to her doorway and taking a breath himself.

"Are you okay?" he asks after standing there for too long silently, trying and failing to hear anything she might be doing. A hand comes up to rub between his eyes, feeling the impending migraine that usually doesn't start until at least late afternoon. He thought this would get easier as the days went on, but having this version of Gamora here is an acute and neverending reminder of their loss. And yet he could never dream of abandoning her, knowing the woman he loves is in there somewhere. When he heard her sing, he thought by some miracle she was back. What other explanation is there? Or more likely, she'd listened to the song without Peter and learned it on her own. It isn't so strange, as jarring as it had been for him. But then why had she run away? Peter raps his knuckles on the metal softly when there's no answer, not wanting to smother her, but he's worried. He won't go unless she comes out here and tells him to leave, he decides, in typical dumb stubborn boy fashion.

[amongfriends]

Gamora shuts her eyes, going to rest her back to the wall as she tries to get it together. It only makes it worse. Flashes of images dance behind her eyes. She opens her eyes, feeling twin tears stream down her cheek. She feels hysterical. Predictably to Peter at the very least, Gamora lashes out.

"Go away!" She hates the sound of her voice. Gamora sounds like an angry child crying in her room. A stray thought dangerously asks, Isn't that what she is being? Beneath her all that anger is a very real fear that something she can't explain is happening to her. That has never boded well. Peter could help her. She's positive he'd do anything if she asked him too as uncomfortable as that truth makes her. Gamora lapses into silence as she mulls on that or more accurately gets past her own ego.

[aromantically]

She didn't come out here, so he doesn't allow it to sway him, instead sliding down the wall to sit and wait her out.

"I can't," he admits, sounding exhausted, mostly because he is. He used to have a partner - a coparent. Now he feels like he's responsible for everyone and her on board. "Take your time. I'll be here when you're ready to talk."

It's exceedingly rational for him, really, no jokes in sight as he lets his head hit the wall and closes his eyes, figuring it will be quite a while until she opens the door.

[amongfriends]

It is a wait though not nearly as long as it might have been even a week ago. She feels unbelievably silly pitching a fit in here after his mature response. Gamora opens the door, but doesn't come out. She waits for him to join her, trusting that he will even without asking.

It still takes another minute before she can say what's bothering her. She can't make eye contact and really it isn't even helpful. She's talking. Isn't that progress? "There's something wrong with me." She admits like it's the hardest thing in the world to say.

[aromantically]

When the door slides open, he cracks one eye then the other, hauling himself to his feet. This is a well-practiced dance by now. At least she did seem to come around quicker than usual. The automatic door shuts behind him and his tired gaze immediately floods with concern anew.

"What is it? Are ya sick?"